So micro-power is seen as the way forward for a greener future in the UK. Seems like a really sensible and cost effective answer. So the government will never work towards it in that case. Not that it matters of course as climate change isn't happening anyway. At least according to some people.....

I get a delivery this morning at work. It's a strange shaped box and I open it to find flowers. Sunflowers to be exact. I don't think anyone has ever sent me flowers before. It made me smile. I have them on my desk now as a reminder. I hope they will last a while although there is no sunlight in this room.

I'm enjoying keeping people in the dark about who sent them to me. So many attempts to try and obtain even the smallest morsel of gossip. I can't say anything here because I know they might read it. But I also know that you - my mystery flower sender - will read this.

And so I say "Thank you!"

Would have loved one of these Turbospoke things on my bike when I was a kid. Instead all I had were some little plastic things (spokey dokeys?) that came free in a packet of Frosties. I was deprived as a child...

Wouldn't have minded some of these either.

Whilst it is a total scam to fleece people out of money, I would have to say people that downloaded the Crazy Frog ringtone in the first place sort of deserve everything they get. As well as a special level in Hell reserved for them, where they have to listen to the ringtone for all eternity....

I've been trying all day to write a post about someone new starting work in my section yesterday but I just can't seem to figure out what to say. Maybe its just down to the fact that I really couldn't care less about this job anymore and have no interest in showing someone new the ropes. Which I suppose makes me a bad boss? Then again, sooner or later he won't be able to help but notice that we are a section without direction. With no work to do we drift along aimlessly, slowly gaining in apathy as we spend the day snacking on ice cream and surfing the internet.

God, I need a new job.

But maybe I'm a good boss? I don't hassle. I don't set impossible to achieve tasks. Need a longer lunchbreak - what do I care.

Did I ever mention that I don't like responsibilty?

Soon he shall be one of us, the weeks and then months passing by in a blur of tedium.

"The second hand on my watch would twitch once, and a year would pass, and then it would twitch again."

The future of video games? Kick Ass Kung-Fu.

Don't argue, just get me one of these right now.

Actually, can I have one of these too whilst you are at it. Can't see any speakers tho...

Richard Whiteley. Me and my housemates sent him a letter once when at uni pretending to be an old couple called Pauline and Stan, telling him we loved his show and liked his ties. He sent us a signed photo. I wonder what happened to that...

Max score of 400 on this game. I blame it on being tired. Or crap. One of the two.....

I think I may be turning into a vampire. Summer is here and the sun is out yet I'm shying away from it as much as possible. Hiding indoors or under trees.

It burns I tell you, it burnsssssss.....

I have two rules regarding blogs and emails.

1) Never post or email anything when drunk.
2) Never post or email anything when upset.

It's just not a good idea. You say things that aren't true. You say things that are too true. You say something but it comes out all wrong. You tell people things you don't want them to know or you simply make no damn sense at all.

I broke one of those rules the other day and upset/hurt a friend that I care about a great deal. They may read this, although I'm not sure they want much to do with me now.

All I can say is I'm sorry....

When I was a young boy I wanted to be a fighter pilot. I don't know why. For some reason that's beyond me now, that dream manifested itself into pretending to be the pet dog (along with some other guy) of a girl called Alexandra Durrant. I called myself F-15 and would run around the playground as fast as I could making 'swoooshing' noises. A pet dog and not fighter pilot none the less. Odd, I know. Maybe a young fetish for domineering women?

As I got older I wanted to be an astronomer. Again I can't really recal what started that off. I had lots of books, a telescope and binoculars. It was fun I guess. That dream led me to doing a degree in Physics at which point I lost most of my interest although I do still occasionally stand staring at the night sky.

It was really at that point that I lost most of my dreams. I no longer wanted to 'be' anything. Wasn't really suer what I wanted to do anymore. Still don't (I'm hoping for some sort of inspiration any time now). Only one dream remained.

I was always a hopless romantic. Not a great trait for a shy guy who would turn into a bumbling prat around women (I know, not much has changed even today). But I always thought I would find my fairytale happy ending. That given enough time I would find 'the one' and everything would be ok in the world. My world anyway. People told me it would happen when I least expected. They were right.

What they don't tell you is what happens when that person doesn't feel the same way about you. You think that it is only a matter of time. That they just don't quite understand and if you explain how you feel enough times and in enough different ways that eventually they will. You know they wont - deep down - but like a shipwrecked sailor clinging onto a peice of driftwood, you refuse to let go of that hope.

But there comes a day when you can't pretend anymore. Maybe not entirely as a tiny part simply refuses - the driftwood is now just a stick and your head is under the water but you are going to hold your breath as long as you can! The rest of you moves on tho.

But what happens to dreams after that?

After about four months and (would those with a nervous disposition or those that do not want to have a lower opinion of me please look away now) almost exactly 600 hours online, I finally took my character in City of Heroes to level 50. I can go no further.

Noooo, that doesn't mean I will stop playing. I have responsibilities to P.I.E and many things yet to do in game. I just won't feel pressured into playing as much now.

For anyone else that plays, you'll find me posing in Atlas Park trying to impress teh newbies.

Yeah, I've been hiding away the last few day. Hopefully the next three posts will explain why....

No posts today. I'd just end up saying something stupid and upset someone.

... that was the problem - it was my genes all along!

After a comment made by my sister on Tuesday about how some friends of hers had bought a really cheap house in another country, I've spent today looking at properties in Bulgaria. At that price, I'll take two!

Well lets be honest, it's the only way I'll ever be able to afford to be a home owner considering the prices in this country...

Not really sure what the point of this game is but it looks and sounds quite nice.

Well, almost. Couple of months from now the Blogathon will be upon us again. Not sure about signing up this year actually? Maybe see how I feel nearer the time...
(thx to Miss Sassafras for the heads up on that)

Not wanting to belittle his efforts but why would anyone want to spend 2 years of thier life inventing a humane machine to kill lobsters which - at a cost of two thousand pounds - is unlikely to be bought by many people? And how many did he have to kill to prefect it? Bet he's fed up of eating lobster too. Cool name tho - the Crusta-stun!!!

I'm a bad son. Not, it's true. You know, I got so caught up thinking about my own life and problems and stuff that I didn't even think to how upset my mum would be that her mother had died. Well, I knew she was upset but I didn't think there was much I could do. I get back to find people have brought her flowers. Cards are sat on the mantlepeice. I never even considered getting her a card. Bad son I tell you....

The funeral went well. Personally I wasn't very upset - she was very old and had had a good life, no reason to mourn - and watched it with a detached eye. It was the eye of someone that hasn't thought much about death, especially his own.

There were around thirty people in the crematorium, the coffin sat just to the right. It looked so small, but then my nan seemed to have been shrinking the last decade or so. The vicar said a few words and we sang a hymn. Then my brother got up to speak - he felt that he wanted to pesonalise the service. If I'm honest, although it was a lovely speech I'm not sure I agreed with all he said. He seemed to have made her more perfect than she was and it wasn't quite the person I remember.

He mananged to reach the end of the speech and sit down before he started to cry. Others in my family didnt last that long. There was another hymn, a dozen prayers (far too many for my liking) and then the curtains were drawn around the coffin...

That was when I started thinking about what I want when I die. I want the cheapest funeral there is, money should be spent on the living not the dead. I want no hymns at my funeral - no one ever wants to sing them. I want no prayers. I want people to dress anyway they want. I don't want people to be sad.

We went back to my mums house after. Some people stayed only long enough to offer condolences. Others - like me - were determined to make it a party. We drank a stupidly large amount, especially considering how early in the day it was. I'll admit, I was plastered.

My body aches (I think I may have cracked a rib - honest) from wrestling with the kids that my sister is currently looking after. Although hazy I remember feeling so sorry for these two children - not even out of their first decade of life - that will never lead a normal life. That chance was taken away from them by a father that beat them horribly, and worse. I felt thankful for my family.

I'm rambling. So many thought over the last day or two and I'm far too lazy to try and arrange them into a coherrent post. I'll leave you with a picture of my nan....

Today I'm heading off home for my nans funeral tomorrow. Unfortunately I've been as lazy at packing my bag as I have been at posting here for the last week. So, I only have time for a few final words before I have to go.

I have some good books - suggested by the ever lovely Bunni - to read on the train. I'm also traveling light as I shall simply be on the train today, at the funeral tomorrow and then on the train again the day after. I've not even packed my suit as

a)I don't really want to be all formal and dull
b)It has some funny sticky substances on it, no doubt obtained at the wedding a few weeks back

It is funny, I do somehow feel that my nan deserves - and would have wanted - us to be relaxed and having a good time rather than all dressed in black with long faces. So I'm going to get drunk and remind people of all the funny times. Like this Christmas when she got up off the sofa and let one rip - big time. Course she was very deaf and didnt even notice but my brother and I just exchanged glances and had to try very hard not to chortle like little kids.

Anyway, I'll be back posting on Thursday. Stay happy folks.

No real reason for posting this other than I found it interesting. Indian policeman aged 5.

... just because I like the website name - Mr Pants. And it's amusing. But mainly the name.

So President Bush see's a future without oil - cars running on biofuel made out of soya beans. Good job there are no negative ecological impact from growing all that soya, is it....

Funky 8-bit music goodness from Desert Planet. I'm fairly sure I've linked to one of thier videos before, the one with the ninja Santa armed with a stick in it...

Who says size doesn't matter? Apparently it does in China....

I've not actually been to see Episode III yet and for some reason can't quite gather enough motivation to go this week either. Maybe I shouldn't bother after reading this review.

Still, even if I don't go I can always read Darth Vaders blog....

Made me chortle but I have a smutty sense of humour. Many comic cover jems to be found on this site. Well worth a look through.

I've mentioned my gran (or Nan as we usually call her) in the past before. A star if ever there was one. For her age, easy going to the extreme. Said she was past letting things worry her. Last time I was home she was telling me how the tablets they had put her on were making her hallucinate.

"I was here one night when this little man appeared, right on top of my telly, and sat looking at me. I wasn't worried though."

She'd seen a lot in her time. Lived through two wars. Lost a newborn daughter. Watched another daughter die of cancer ten years ago. Her family used to own whole streets down in Bristol - they were apparently very well off.

Some might call her slightly racist and I did cringe with some of her comments sometimes. I think she was simply from a time that didn't know any better. She always thought that eating rice would turn you yellow.

"You're my favourite" she would say to me when I went to visit on my trips home. I'm not sure what I did that impressed her so much? Made me feel guilty as I was the one member of the family that had moved hundreds of miles away and rarely saw her.

"You've got years left in you yet nan" was one of the last things I said to her as I kissed her on the cheek on my last visit a few weeks ago.

I had a phone call last night to tell me she died yesterday morning. At 94 it wasn't exactly a surprise but it was rather sudden. She wouldn't have known a thing the doctors have said. Just collapsed on the floor and died, the boiled egg she had just made herself for breakfast still waiting on the table with the top chopped of. I'm glad it happened so fast.

Strangely I wasn't upset. She had a good run and I don't think she would want people to be upset by it - she didn't like fuss. So I went downstairs and hunted through my array of drinks. Gin would have been appropriate but I can't stand the stuff. Lacking Tequila I settled on Sambuca and downed a shot in her memory.

Play real life Pacman. And if you don't have $20,000 then you could try the cheaper version.

LG creates a magic mirror, another example maybe of technology being used just for the sake of it? Am I really going to stand in front of a mirror to check my daily schedule or see what the weather is like? Besides, won't we have voice activated computers to tell us all that stuff soon anyway?

And how cool is this electrified bug swatter!! Technology as it should be used.

Well, I supose it's one way to make shopping more exciting. I wonder if she uses one? On second thoughts, lets not think about that.

Also, after my last post maybe there is an easier way for me to get fit....

I like to be honest in this blog (well, most of the time) so I think it would be fair to admit that I am currently in the worst physical shape I have ever been in. A veritable train wreck of a man. Since the ending of basketball I have been jogging maybe a couple of times - the last being a couple of months back - and all other sporting activities have ceased. Unless you count rounders but that's only exercising one arm with a little running thrown in if you actually manage to hit the ball. Which I do, everytime. But I hit it a long way so can generally walk round the bases.

I spend many hours sat playing computer games whilst using that well known substitute for proper food - beer! Well actually wine - is that more healthy?

End result, I'm a wreck. Not much has changed appearance wise but lets just say I'm not going to challenge any 8 year old girls to an arm wrestling contest anytime soon for fear of being shown up....

Tired and hungover but I had a damn good night. Sound quality was a bit poor and it was hard to hear some of what was being said in between tracks - which is a shame as D. Wayne usually has some amusing stuff to say. The venue is pretty small too so with nowhere to put my coat and people pressed up against me all around (not such a bad thing in some cases) it got a little sweaty. Damn good night tho.

For today I simply leave you with the 12 step plan brother.

Step One
You admit you are powerless under me
Step Two
You figure that's just gotta be jelly cos jam just don't shake like that
Step Three
Make a searching inventory of all your good shit
Step Four
Inventory taken, you hand all that good shit over to me
Step Five
Having divined I am the real thing you get down on your knees
Step Six
....and humbly ask me to remove your underthings
Step Seven
And make ready for me to do mah thing
Step Eight
Naked now you're ready to understand mah kind of lovin'
Step Nine
Lovin men, lovin women, lovin all God's creatures
Step Ten
And in turn you're divestments having been completed
Step Eleven
Ah get turned on by you,and in turn being turned on by you
Step Twelve
I know you're ready to become a disciple, a lonely little reverend making his way day by day in the congregation. Hustling a dollar here, a dollar there, selling pictures of The King to bring back to the coffers of the all powerful, all holy Reverend Doctor D.W.A.Y.N.E Love, first Reverend of The First Presleytarian Church Of Elvis The Divine.

I was reminded of an old saying by a post of Bunni's a few weeks back - "Aim low and you'll never be dissapointed". It's stuck with me since.

Tonight I'm off to see Alabama 3 in Nottingham. I was invited by a couple of friends about a month ago and the plan was to go to the gig and then stay over in their house. I like them both, great couple that seem made for each other.

I had a call last night to tell me that things were still okay for the gig but I couldnt really stay in the house as they were now in the process of seperating. And I thought to myself again, is this how things always work out? Aim low.....