Rudolph found to only be worth £2850 after he is killed by the Danish air force.

Strange, you'd think a flying reindeer with a radioactive nose would be worth a few more quid than that....

US army drops enquiry into gruesome pictures for porn reports.

More pluggage for a fantastic film - Serenity. Not that I've seen it yet but the series (Firefly) was fantastic and I'm expecting the film to be too. Damn them for cancelling that series - damn them I say!!

*ahem*

Anyway, us brits have to wait another month for this but you lucky US types get to go and watch it today. So, go watch it today!

It's also got fit women in it.

(this film has been given the official BlogMonkey stamp of approval)

So the story that an 87 year old man is thrown out of the labour party conference for heckling is bad enough. What seems worse is that he was held under anti-terrorism laws when he tried to get back in.

Nice to see those laws not being missused then.....

Is it the sign of a good night or a bad one when you wake up the next morning with the shakes? Maybe it's just a sign that I should have eaten more than a small bowl of cheesy chips and some wotsits.

Whilst I do feel like a used teabag today it's not really that much of a surprise to me. Yesterday afternoon saw the leaving presentation of a long time member of staff and I of course went along to wish him farewell. It might have also crossed my mind that there would be a small selection of snacks and some free wine laid on for the event....

With most people driving, going home to the family or just being generally boring, the ten bottles (five red and five white) were easily enough for the gathered crowd. The speeches were given and people chatted for a bit but then slowly they started to head home. In the end, even the catering staff (one poor bloke that looked like he'd rather be doing something else) locked up shop and left an increasingly nosiy four of us in a quiet room with several bottles of wine.

Then it was off to the pub - stolen bottle of wine drunk on the way! The antics in the pub are a little hazy to me. I remember several very noisy and testosterone filled arm wrestling contests (not taking part personally - that would be too embarassing). I remember laughing so hard that my side hurt but I can't exactly remember what about. And then I remember the walk home in the heavy rain and getting in the house feeling freezing cold and looking like I'd just been swimming with my clothes on.

I should also say sorry to Bunni who I then had a drunken conversation with on MSM.

You can probably also imagine how rough I felt when my alarm went off at 5:40am this morning...

MuVo now playing a song with many memories attached - Barenaked Ladies: The Flag.

Fish Fingers are 50 years old. I (apparently) used to love them as a kid and eat them by the bucket load. I'm still pretty fond of the odd fish finger sarnie even now.

I do find it hard to believe that a poll in 1993 found Captain Birds Eye was the most recognised captain after Captain Cook. Really? I know which one I'd recognise...

This is tres cool (like my use of French there - certain people would be very happy with that). Would have posted it the other day but trying to play one of the movies crashed my computer (as 50% of movies seem to) and then I forgot...

It has something to do with the 100th anniversary of Jules Verne’s Around the World in Eighty Days. Might have to read that book sometime.

...to dream. Like the one I had last night.

I was living in a little house on the beach in a far away place with someone very special. I was happy because I made her happy. But just a dream in the end I guess. Made me wonder tho, what do other people dream of. And am I ever in those dreams....

Yup, Kel checked for me and the Blogmonkey in question was not your own dear (slightly drunk) BlogMonkey but this person. Makes me wonder

a) How The Guardian found that post and
b) If she knows she got quoted?

Maybe - like Kel says - I need to be more controversial to get in the papers....

Update: Poons has linked to the same person but on a different topic. Spooky. Appreciate the lack of Googlejuice tho mate.

Update update: The article in question.

This one is for Bunni who I know like the odd horror movie. Sexual Parasite: Killer Pussy

So I caught a lift back home from the pub with my housemate last night and I'm idly flicking through The Guardian that he'd left on the front seat, when he says to me...

"You were in there yesterday you know"

"Err, what?" I say, a little confused.

"Yeah, they were quoting something you said. Blogmonkey your page, isn't it?"

"Yup. What did they quote?" I ask, starting to get a bit worried and trying to remember what I'd written recently.

"Can't remember, I'll check the paper again tomorrow. Sure it was Blogmonkey or something like that"

So I'm left wondering if I really did get quoted and if so, about what. I mean, there are not many BlogMonkeys on the internet. Some bloggers occassionally refer to themselves as blogmonkeys. There are another couple of webpages with that name which have been abandoned but I'm still up there, right at the top of search results and easily the most active.

I can't say I'm feeling that great today. At first I put it down to a lack of sleep last night (don't ask) or the kingsized MarsBar and bottle of fizzy pop I had mid morning. But when I got round to eating lunch I found I really didn't feel like it - just tasted like cardboard.

Maybe a quick pint after work will cure me? Not that I feel that bad - never really get ill me. Been working here 8 years and not one day off through sickness yet. Friend of mine got a certificate for going a whole year with no sickdays at his workplace. Do I get anything. Nope. Not fair... *mumble*... want a certificate *mutter*....

My favourite query this week

"I've bought a new battery for my laptop, can you tell me how to charge it."

"Plug laptop into wall socket. Leave for a while."

I'm such a helpful chap.

A giant pink bunny - oooookay.

Don't say I don't ever help to keep you entertained during those dull days at work.

First up, it seems like only a few weeks back that Grow RPG was out and now we have Grow Cube from the same clever chappy. Seems a little harder as well.....

I played this a little before I left yesterday afternoon. A good flash mystery game - The Goat in the Grey Fedora.

I woke up this morning and I looked in the mirror and you know what? I looked rough. Not just a little bit rough but really rough.

Maybe it was staying up until midnight drinking wine and playing computer games? Maybe it's because I haven't shaved in three days? It could be that since basketball finished back in January, I'm not sure I've done anything that could be classed as proper exercise even once. Combine that with eating far too much chocolate and too many takeaways and I'm probably in the worst physical shape I've ever been in.

As I stood there and tried on various shirts and tops from my cupboard, I struggled to find anything that I felt good in.

I think maybe I need to make a few changes to my lifestyle....

Or maybe I just need to get used to looking like roadkill.

I'm getting some very funny looks today. You'd think people had never seen a man in a pirate hat before....

Don't forget what day it is today!!!

edit: Be ye following this link for yer piratey name. Yarrrr!

So Mr Psychbloke was right and the last story I posted is in fact an urban myth. I should have known better. Still, I was feeling lazy on Friday (far too lazy to check) and it was a good story anyway.

It's Friday, I'm feeling lazy and I'm trying to kill the last three hours of a very long day, so I'm afraid no exciting links from me today. I shall however tell you a story that was told to me last night. It's a tale heard from a friend who heard it from a colleague whose friend it involved. I have no reason to doubts it's authenticity though and frankly, it's far too good not to tell anyway.

Apprently this person has a son with Down's Syndrome. He's about 18 and they decided to go on a day out to Drayton Manor. They let him go off on his own for a bit to explore but told him a specific time to get back.

That time came and went and they started to get a bit worried. After about 30 minutes he turned up - soaking wet - and they set off for home (presumably not enquiring as to why he was a little damp). They thought it odd that he was so quiet on the trip but didn't give it much thought. When they got back he vanished into his bedroom and again was suspiciously quiet. They went to investigate and found the reason he was so quiet was that he'd taken something whilst there and hidden it in his backback to bring home.

He'd stolen a penguin.

The kid has style.

Now whose a clever boy then.
(link via Poons)

Eight children kept in cages but the parents aren't charged! How the hell does that work?

I was debating if I should post this or not as I thought some people might find it in bad taste. But I decided that people should be able to decide for themselves and I just post stuff I find interesting/weird/amusing/topical/etc.. The image is the link btw.

Besides, if I was really going for bad taste I'd post a link to this.

But I would never do that...

An interesting animation for an interesting cause. Not something I was really aware of...

Probably a spoof but you never can tell - Lesbian Phonecall.

Kept me amused for a little while - Infect. Evolve. Repeat.

Next monday is Talk like a Pirate Day. I have my pirate hat all ready. And a eyepatch. Tho that makes typing hard. And I may look a little silly on the helpdesk.

This is a good excuse to do something stupid and you should never waste a chance to do something stupid!

I just love finding these totally pointless studies done by reseachers that usually end up confirming something blatantly obvious. For example, watching more TV leads to fatter kids. Shock, you mean watching telly rather than being out playing footy makes you overweight - who would have thought.

Quite amusing CG movie - In The Rough (from the same company that did Rockfish if you can remember back to when I linked to that).
(link via Danger Betty)

The Scree is a mix of animation and live action. Nice to watch although the streaming was pretty stuttered for me.

I turned up at the party on Saturday night and quickly realized I didn't know anyone apart from the host. My first can of beer was soon drunk as I stood off to one side with nothing better to do than continually take swigs from it. I decided at this point that I needed to mingle more so cast my eye over the party goers to try and find the one that I thought I'd get on best with. Someone with similar interests. My intellectual equal. I soon found her. We spent a good hour together and got on really well.

Unfortunately little Simone had to go home at that point as it was way past her bedtime. We didn't even get to finish the Lego machine that we were making to carry my beer around in.

I had to actually go and talk to adults at that point.

I've definitely been thinking too much recently - which is bad as it was supposed to be one of my resolutions not to do that this year. Not that I've really done much better with the others on the list (I was thinking about doing an mid year update but it seemed too depressing).

One of the things I've been thinking about is how 3/4 of the year has almost gone and I've achieved pretty much nowt. Well, unless you count spending close to 1000 hours playing a computer game (which odly enough I worked out to be about the same amount of time as I've spent idly surfing the internet at work when I have nothing better to do). As I may have mentioned earlier in the year, I've simply not found a good reason to try and do anything productive this year.

It's likely to go down as a year best forgotten.

Maybe it was this same lethargy but when I got into work at 7am on Thursday morning, I soon realized that I couldn't face another brain meltingly dull day at work. So I took half the day off (a 10:30am finsh). I did the same yesterday. Hence my lack of posting.

Tonight I have a party to go to. I'm half asleep already. Maybe beer will help?

Good idea.

Silly idea (I'm sorry but it is).

A little musical entertainment to start your day - Sune Sings. I'd recommend Dancing Queen first personally.
(link via Bloggerheads)

Found this quite interesting to watch. Fox news reporters Shep Smith and Geraldo just dumbfounded at the state of affairs in New Orleans.

More interesting then the BBC reporter who I saw on the news this morning. He claimed it was like getting a glimpse at a 'post apocalyptic city where all the normal rules no longer applied'. When asked to go into more detail, he described how you could drive down the street the wrong way if you liked. Then told how you could drive down the freeway the wrong way if you liked. Then he went into a story about how they had seen people taking their dog for a walk on the freeway.

Any stories not about roads by any chance?

Save the world, run your car on veggie oil by converting it using the Greasecar vegetable fuel system.

"Would you like to fill up on virgin or extra virgin olive oil sir?"

Clicky for picturey goodness.

While I'm on the topic - an open letter and suggestion to the guy in question.

Must be a slow news day - cat turns pink.

Also, exploding chocolate - now that's low!

It may sounds daft but I've actually missed most of what has been going on in New Orleans and the other areas affected by hurricane Katrina. Don't ask me how, I just don't seem to have really watched the news in about a week.

I've been doing some catching up today. It's hard to believe what's going on.

I don't mean the human tragedy, the pictures you see on the numerous news programs and websites make that abudantly clear. It's how badly everything was screwed up.

Pesident Bush gave a speach yesterday where he said

"I don't think anybody anticipated the breach of the levees. They did appreciate a serious storm but these levees got breached and as a result much of New Orleans is flooded and now we're having to deal with it and will,"

yet you just have to read a few news reports - such as this one from The Guardian - to see that isn't true.

"In 2001, when George Bush became president, the Federal Emergency Management Agency issued a report stating that a hurricane striking New Orleans was one of the three most likely potential disasters - after a terrorist attack on New York City. But by 2003 the federal funding essentially dried up as it was drained into the Iraq war. By 2004, the Bush administration cut the corps of engineers' request for holding back the waters of Lake Pontchartrain by more than 80%"

"A year ago the US army corps of engineers proposed to study how New Orleans could be protected from a catastrophic hurricane, but the Bush administration ordered that the research not be undertaken."

You can find more of the same if you look around.

I know the task is a huge one but aid seems to be taking far too long to reach people and in that time people are dying. I've looked around a few unrelated forums and on places like this BBC page and I've seen people saying things like this

" Where is the United Nation? Where are the great countries of the world? We need help. Refugees need help. Help them. Help us. The US can not do it on its own. We need help. Where are you?"

They seem to be under the impression that America is facing this alone but from what I've heard, the UN and numerous countries have offered aid but it has been rejected. Presumably because the American government wants to appear to 'be able to handle things on their own'. But they aren't handing it very well - people are dying - and yet they still refuse help.

Maybe the thing I found most amazing today was hearing a 'shoot to kill' policy had been declared on looters. For the armed gangs roaming the streets, raping and stealing food from hosiptals - then maybe. But does this also mean the bloke breaking into a shop for fresh water is as likely to be killed outright? Hell, are there not more important things to be worrying about than stoping two people from stealing a television?

Now is not the time to apportion blame - as I've seen said in numerous place - but I hope that time does come....

... erotic photographer.

Nuff said.

Today not only marks me being stuck in this job for 8 years (not thinking about it. not thinking about it...) but is also Uzbekistan's Independance day. Bloggers are being called on to use this day to try and promote awareness of what is going on in Uzbekistan and a pledge has been set up over at PledgeBank.

I'll admit to not knowing all the in's and out's of what is going on over there but through people like Tim Ireland and Craig Murray, I've read enough over the past few months to know it's not good and that the American government and ours are turning a blind eye. Which is why I'm adding my small contribution.

If you want to know more I would suggest taking a look at this post of Tim's which has more links than you can shake a big leafy stick at. Maybe watch this little animation of his. Take a look and see what Craid Murray has to say over at his site.

Read. Learn. Post. Spread the word.

Destruction of the Amazon rainforest halved. Only 3500 square miles destroyed in the last year - thats ok then.

Recently I've not been doing very well when it comes to friends. For instance last week I let my own feelings get in the way and dissapointed a friend. A couple of months back I did something stupid and effectively ended a friendship. Yesterday I sent a letter and permanantly ended another.

At this rate, I'll never have a single person to go for a drink with....