I actually thought about this last night whilst watching the news. Will banning violent porn stop violent sexual crimes? I really doubt it. It's the same sort of debate about violent computer games causing violence. Yet it now will become an offense to look at violent porn which I feel is stepping over the bounds on the personal choice people should have.

Another news piece on lightbulbs.

Woman has car crash whilst teaching her dog to drive.

"She thought she would let the dog 'have a try' while she operated the accelerator and brake," the report said. "They did not make it far before crashing into an oncoming car."

Wicked Lasers - "Wield the power of the sun in the palm of your hand"

I'd like to point out to them that the Sun is a giant thermonuclear reactor which is nothing like a big laser. I'd also like them to note that I can do that sort of thing with a magnifying glass on a sunny day - probably with more effect actually.

It's payday and contrary to what I expected, I did get a pay rise!

Thirteen pence.

My employers are so great.

Still I'm better off than the hundreds of people that interpreted their job evaluation letters as meaning they got a years worth of backpay this month (some went out and started spending it) only to find that actually, that wasn't the way it worked....

As I mentioned a fair few months back, it's about time for me to get (or build to be more accurate) a new computer. I don't like rushing these things tho and tend to wait - keeping an eye on prices and technology - untill I feel the time is right to buy. It's about the right time.

*Warning - nerdy computer geek stuff coming*

The release of these has given me a base on which to build my new pooter and so I've spent the last couple of days pouring over internet reviews and online stores trying to find the best components for the least money.

Now me being me I not only wanted to build something that was fast, quiet and shiny, I wanted to build something that was environmentally friendly. That adds a whole extra problem when trying to pick parts. I'd already had my eye on the processor as I knew it was a low power part (with energy saving technology that reduces power consumption even more when just surfing the internet and the like) and being low power it runs cooler so less fans needed. Spent a while finding myself a cheap power supply that was also about as energy efficient as I could find. Then I came to choosing a new monitor.

Picking a new monitor is not easy at the best of times. There are so many important factors such as price, build quality, picture quality, warranty, good reviews etc.. that it narrows your choices. I was also throwing another couple in with low power consumption and will be good for watching DVDs on (seeing as I still don't have a telly). Finding one which matches all the criteria is not a simple task and - after two days of looking - I'll admit I've failed. I have however found my monitor of choice - a 19' Widescreen LCD by this company. Great on paper, excellent reviews and about fifty to one hundred quid cheaper than anything else comparable out there! But the power consumption (55W) was much higher than I would have liked (best I saw was 38W).

Feeling a little guilty, I decided to do some calculations (I get sad like this sometimes - it comes from having a scientist background).

My current CRT monitor uses 80W, so I'd be saving 25W. That works out at a saving of 0.025KWh per hour. Multiplying by the average number of hours I use the pooter a week and then by weeks in a year I am saving 45.5KWh a year. Thats about £6 off my electricity bill a year. Yay! According to this handy online calculator, that's also 22Kg or 0.022 tonnes less of CO2 being pumped into the atmosphere a year by me.

However, if I go for the more energy efficient (and non-widescreen) model I'd be saving a further 31KWh a year - or 0.012 tonnes of CO2 - with a reduction in my 'lecy bill of another £4 odd (as the first monitor is £60 less, I'd make that money back in 15 years with electricity saved).

So, I've decided to go with monitor number one and offset my extra carbon emmisions - which according to this calculator means I need to make a donation of eight pence a year. I might just donate a fiver instead to cover a few extras.....

A postman is suspended for telling customers how to stop junk mail. Royal Mail really didn't give this much thought did they. His actions resulted in 70 people or so opting out. You can see how Royal Mail wouldn't want people opting out as it does amount to a fair bit of their income but surely they could just have taken the guy to one side and had a little word. Oh no, they suspend him and it makes the national news. Result, hundreds and possibly thousands of people hear about it and decide to opt out as well. Can we hear you say "Ooops" Royal Mail?

And in case you are interested...

"To opt out of this service, customers should follow the official process which is to contact Royal Mail on 08457 950 950. Alternatively, customers can write to: Door to Door Opt Outs, Royal Mail, Kingsmead House, Oxpens Road, Oxford OX1 1RX.

People can reduce the amount of personalised, addressed mail they receive by contacting an organisation called the Mailing Preference Service (MPS), DMA House, 70 Margaret Street, London W1W 8SS by ringing 08457 034 599 or by visiting www.mpsonline.org.uk"

Edit: It's been pointed out to me that you can now no longer opt out by phone or email. Only option is to inform them by post. Adding barriers to put people off AND bumping their profits all in one go. Got to give them a little credit...

A little chuckle to start the day.



(link via Live Out Loud)

Stealing the idea from Bunni - searches that have brought people here this month.

Jet Beetle. You wouldn't want to be behind that at traffic lights. Check out the moped towards the end too - I can so see Batgirl on that thing.

Not sure how I feel about councils starting to bug bins. It's a slight overreaction to say it's an invasion of privacy - the only information they will get is the weight of rubbish I throw out and I really don't think that's heading into 'Big Brother' territory. Plus I'm all for encouraging recycling. Thing is people will be charged extra for throwing away lots of stuff but would I see a tax rebate for keeping my rubbish down to one small carrier bag full a week? I think not....

I spoke to my mum last night for the first time since forgetting her birthday last week. I was waiting to see if I was in the doghouse but not only did she seem fine about it, she'd made excuses for me too!

"Nevermind, it's probably being in love that made you forget."

At first I was slightly worried that she was heading down the 'can I hear the sound of wedding bells' road again but now I'm thinking this could be dead handy.

"Did you post your brother an anniversary card?"
"Forgot - in love remember"

"Are you coming home for christmas?"
"Can't - in love"

"Did you remember to look up that stuff on the internet that I asked yo.."
"Love"

Not sure this excuse will work on anyone but my mum tho. Shame...

Polar bear genitals are shrinking.

What I want to know is what sort of person sits there trying to think of what they want to spend their research grant on and suddenly goes "Polar bear genitals!! Of course!"?

Now as I'm sure all you boys out there know, this movie will be out in less than a year now. Now some people are a little worried that it's starting to look too far removed from the original (Generation 1) format. You can sort of see what they mean if you compare the old and (prototype but probably what he'll look like) Megatron....



I mean what the hell is that? I think every Transfan (I'm down with the lingo) that's seen that second picture has shuddered as a little peice of their childhood was ripped from them. On the other hand you would have to say that the new Bumblebee looks a damn site less gay than he did before.



So I'm really keeping an open mind at the moment. There were going to be changes and this was never going to be a pure G1 movie. That could well be a good thing as a lot of the stuff from the 80s looks a bit dated now and a revamp may prove to be even better than we hope. The only thing I'm dreading is an awful script that has nothing to do with the transformers at all.

Oh and that guy is right - Optimus with a flame logo???

Getting silly yet?

Really can't think of anything to say...

Film director hits back at critics - literally

Man struck by lightning but doesn't notice. Not the best bit of the story for me tho - oh no...

"He also told the BBC that, in 1990, he had to go to hospital to have a toothbrush extracted from his ear after he fell in the shower. "That was embarrassing," he said."

Um, how??

Although sayig that, a friend of mine once lept out of his futon in the morning, slipped and sat on the nozzle bit of a radiator by the bed. Or at least that was the story he gave me about why he was walking funny for days after...

Remember this last year. Guess who did it again this year. Only this time it's worse. My sister-in-law tried to get me out the dog house by texting to remind me to call. Only problem was I had accidentally left my phone at work last night. So I only got the message this morning. Which is a little late.

Oh well, too late to try and fix things now. I'll just take this one on the chin.

This is a little overdue but better late than never I say.

Last week I got a pressie. All the way from America. I like pressies. The lovely Bunni sent me this great, hand made pot holder. Bless.

Couple of interesting little animations for you.

Le château de sable

The Big Snit

The Seal Cookbook. No, not a cookbook by this guy...

Proximity. Kept me ocupied for a while.

(link via Danger Betty)

Radio advert banned because it could have led people to pornographic material. Basically some woman misspelt the URL and went here instead of here. Now whilst I agree that the advert should be changed as people may well end up on the wrong page, it's only because that doesn't help the site in question not because it will lead people to porn! Hell, I've been to that page and I can't find any porn no matter how hard I try (not that I would want to of course). Worst I managed to find were some slightly dodgy 'adult dating' links. Is she not aware that all she has to do is type something like this into a search engine for far worse results?

Alternatively, you could just watch the Swedish news...

I'm with Gerard on this one. Nothing against any religion but do you not think dressing your kids like this might possibly cause some issues?

So first off a woman with claustrophobia causes a flight to be diverted. Then a note on a sick bag causes another diversion. Then we get people thrown off planes because they weren't wearing flipflops and shorts and were speaking in another language.

I'm not saying there isn't a terrorist threatcos there is - something that was confirmed today (although you have to wonder how much of a threat it was) - but I think the media and governments constant fueling of the fires is really creating a society of fear. Did the sick bag note plane scare really need all the coverage it got? I remember back about 15 years ago our whole school had to evacuate one day because a couple of lads thought it would be funny to phone up and say there was a bomb somewhere in the classrooms. I'm sure that didn't get frontpage coverage and it probably affected far more people.

Just saying is all....

I'm really not sure what to say about this clip - except it's NSFW. Extra points if you can tell where it is heading.

Urinal sculptures. To be honest I'd be so nervous that something was about to leap out an me (especially with some of those giant shell ones) I might not actually be able to.. err.. 'perform' when using them.

If you are off dancing tonight, don't forget treadmill.

Being a Friday night I decided to call in to the corner shop on my way home and grab a few beers. As usual I declined a plastic bag to carry them in as I'm only two minutes walk away from my flat and it's a waste of a bag. I'm half way back when one of the cans slips out the plastic binder thing and falls on the floor. It must have hit a stone or something as a tiny hole starts instantly shooting a (quite impressive) geyser of beer everywhere.

Mindfull of the fact that I'm opposite a call centre and people are watching me out the window, I grab the can (getting a spray of beer in my face) and put my finger over the hole to stem the beery tide. This leaves me with a problem. I'm not stopping the flow totally and so risk getting beer all through my flat (not to mention what I do when I have to take my finger off anyway). I contemplate shoving my mouth over the hole but last time I tried something like that I felt drunk about 5 minutes later. So I decide to let it run it's course.

I was stood there for a good 45 seconds - smiling politely to the people on phones across the road - whilst looking like some weird beer fountain and smelling like a brewery. Waste of good beer too. :(

Sure I blogged about this a month or so ago (although I can't find it so maybe I just read it and forgot to post it). Wasn't expecting it to still be a problem after all this time. Mud flood threatens Java villages after a drilling 'accident'.

Japanese scientist devise plan to create a new baby universe. Might be one where the Hoff rules supreme.

It's Friday and that means it time for some Hoff!! Check out the top 50 Hoff clips.

Redheads have more sex than blondes or brunettes. Interesting....

First thing I read this morning on t'interwebnet and I had to chuckle.

Philippines judge who consulted imaginary mystic dwarves is sacked.

I must have mentioned it before but never sure I linked to it - Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Seems perfectly sensible to me. Be sure to check out the hate-mail section too.

And this is just cute.

More detailed info here. I also like the climate change vs pirate theory.

The fight to change your keyboard layout is on - CAPSoff.

True to my word I've been looking at websites and flicking through the paper looking for a new job. No hurry yet but I'm trying to get into the right mindset.

One thing that occurred to me yesterday whilst flicking through the wanted ads was that I'm really never going to progress very far. All the jobs earning a nice sum more than me (and for 'nice' read about five thousand) involved responsibility. Now me and responsibility have never gone well together. Technically I'm supposed to be responsible for two members of staff at the moment but the reality is far different.

It kind of bothered me for a moment when I thought about the friends I have on £30-40,000 already and how I will never likely earn anything like that in my whole life. But then money never made me happy, so maybe it's not a big loss when there are far more important things in life.

I ask you, how could I not post a story with the headline Newly discovered worm fences with penis?!

"Have at ye and fear my mighty weapon knave!"

Not really related but a (fairly non-scientific) survey shows that a large number of christians are addicted to porn - where they seem to class 'addicted' as looking at some naughty things on t'interwebnet once a week or something. If that were the case I'd imagine 99% of 15 year old boys with internet access are addicted....

You are what you search.

MermaidRentals.com - for all your mermaid rental needs.

So I posted about a fish that speared a fisherman a week or so ago and now they are attacking jetskiers. I'm telling you fellow humans, the day of the fish is coming...

In need of your own tank? Try a Badonkadonk. The comments are pretty amusing too....

For.. I dunno.. a year or so, I've been reading a certain blog on and off. Can't remember how I found it (well actually I can but I'm not telling you) and it's never been put on my blogroll for reason that'll probably be apparent if you take a look. Not that I'm embarrased (or I wouldn't be mentioning it now), I just wasn't sure most people that visited here would expect a link to a sexual explicit blog - it's sort of out of place amongst my other links.

This person went out of their way to stay annonymous on the blog and when they wrote a book and had it published, put as much effort into keeping it that way. So what did a certain Sunday paper do in the name of public interest - they tracked her down and exposed her, throwing her life into turmoil. She's been driven from her home, had to explain things to her parents and feels her job is now over. I find it pretty sickening really.

I would admit to a little idle curiousity about her identity but if by some twist of fate I'd come into possesion of that information, it would never have crossed my mind for a second to reveal it - out of respect for her wishes and the obvious problems it would cause. The article in question even says

"The author says on her blog she is “paranoid” that her identity will be exposed, possibly by an embittered former lover. In the acknowledgments in her book she makes it clear she would be embarrassed if her parents read of her exploits.

They may as well have tagged on the end "but we thought 'F*ck that, we'll screw her life up anyway!'".

I know for a fact that I'll never buy that particular paper again.

Non-news story of the day - UK bank details sold in Nigeria.

Is it a new revelation that old hard disks contain info that can be retrieved? No, every three months or so there is a 'shocking survey' that finds drives on eBay contain personal data. Is there any evidence that Nigerian scammers are actually getting information of old drives and using it to do naughty things? Not that I can tell from the video clip of the program I watched. They have simply taken the fact that most people don't wipe old data properly and the fact that these drives are sold in Nigeria and combined them to create a 'scary' news story.

You know the music was loud when you wake up the next morning and your ears are still ringing.

So it was Summer Sundae this weekend and it was pretty decent. Apart from the weather (but it always seems to be naff for the SS weekend for some reason). Have to say that a lot of the music wasn't really to my taste but I did see a few acts I quite liked such as Kismet, the Storm Thieves, Captain and Jose Gonzalez. Although I'm not really into punk rock, the Buzzcocks certainly had the most energy out of all the bands I went to see - they played pretty much non stop for an hour. Think they might be the reason my ears don't work today...

The festival itself was the biggest one I've seen yet - has grown so much in the last few years. Still quite a nice cosy size tho. It is also a great opportunity to meet up with some mates that I only ever really see once a year for the event - was great to see you and the family if you are reading this Sparky.

Finally in a first for BlogMonkey (and because I didn't want you to feel left out), I took some video of Jose Gonzalez which is available for you to see here. File is around 13MB and sound isn't great but it's only recorded on my digital camera.

A little insight into how photographers and the media often try to make things more dramatic than they actually are.

I do get a bit tired of media hype sometimes. Although I don't have a TV I can well imagine that all the UK news channels had nothing but coverage of the bomb plots yesterday, regardless of the fact that there was very little actual information. They just seem determined to make things out to be as bad as possible. They are not alone though, police start using statements with phrases like "mass murder on an unimaginable scale!". Well not really unimaginable, kinda like the Sept 11th scale and nowhere near the scale of seconds world war concentration camps. Then they bring in all these new airport security measure. I'm pretty sure liquid explosives have not just been invented - I've watched old westerns where they defeat the mexicans by throwing bottles of nitroglycerine at them - so why the measure now? Almost playing on peoples fears it seams sometimes...

I'm not saying the police haven't done a good job with this - far from it. Just wish it wasn't turned into such a frenzied event everytime.

Apparently there is a manga/gaming event being held at the uni today. And there are cosplayers!! That would explain the large man/woman (wasn't sure which) dressed kinda like sailor moon. I'm so going to go have a look later.

edit: Been for a quick look and is tres cool. Apparently it is Amecon - the largest anime event in the UK.

'Mole Man' ordered to stop after digging tunnels under his house for 40 years. Well I suppose everyone needs a hobby...

Totally unrelated we have a meat cake (Bakerina take note). Not sure if the thought of it makes me feel hungry or slightly ill....

Bag of crabs.

I looked for crabs when I went to the seaside last week. I only found one. It wasn't very big.

For all you folks out there that hate that Frosties advert. You know the one...

"They're gonna taste great..."

You know, I have the time to pull off this sort of Office prank. Shame I usually lack the motivation....

A penguin is probably the last thing you expect to run into (literally) when driving down a Texas highway. Quite surprised the octopus survived too...

I remember visiting my sister on her farm one time and all of a sudden my brother-in-law decided that he was going to build a treehouse. We gathered up loads of old planks, parts of fence, plastic etc.. and built this fairly huge thing with a balcony, rope ladder and a couple of windows. Technically it wasn't a proper treehouse as it was only about 10 feet up and resting on a tree stump which was on top of a mound. Still, me and my nephews had a few fun nights sleeping out in it.

If only it had been more like these however. (Firefox users may find their milage varies when viewing this site)

Worth a watch - Call Center.

Think your house is secure? Watch this and then decide. More detailed technical info here.

I wanted to get a lock picking set once. Never quite got around to it. I was always pretty good at picking locks with paperclips and bits of stuff at school and thought it would be a good hobby and handy when you loose your keys or need to 'borrow' something from someones house and they happened to be out.

Just forget you heard that last bit...

I'm trying to kill my last 25 mins at work. This helped.

So a recent survey says that two thirds of Britons wouldn't know where they were in the country without a major landmark to help (prompting this BBC quiz). Is that really surprising? Remove the landmarks and you are just left with ordinary looking stuff that could be anywhere and you are unlikely to recognise unless you'd been there. One of the pictures in the quiz is of a field - why the hell would you know where you were just by looking at a field!?

What? It annoyed me...

Sure Doppleganger will appreciate this - chocolate dalek.

edit:I think that blog is going on my (chocolate)blogroll - mmmmmm

Heh.

(lack of proper wordiness is down to supreme boredom and loss of higher brain function. Normal service will be resumed shortly)

One for the ladies here, the OhMiBod. Yup, it's and iPod vibrator attachment although it looks more like a strip lighbulb.

"A whole new way to plug 'n play"

The Euphemism Generator - good for wasting 45 seconds of your life.

"He was very god at pounding the pocket brontosaurus"

Darth Vader being a bit of a git. Made me chortle anyway.

Fish strikes back. And who said fishing was a dull sport....

An interesting theory on how NASA may have nuked Jupiter.

So maybe what I need in light of recent events is a bar like this?

About ten minutes. That's how long it took work to kill my nice relaxed holiday feeling. I wasn't bothered by my digital radio seemingly having lost it's ability to pick up any stations or the letter from a debt collection agency chasing an unpaid electricty bill waiting for me when I got home. Finding out that certain members of my family seem to be screwing me over with regard to the shares left to me by my Nan only slightly peeved me.

Then I got into work to find that I'm now getting paid £1000 less a year under the new pay scheme!

Oh technically I'm not getting paid less, my pay is 'frozen' for about two years. That does mean I start losing money as of April next year.

Is there a silver lining? Oh aye. I've been stuck here for nine years with little incentive to leave but I believe the university has just given me the kick up the arse I need. I'm soooo gone from this job.

It's amazing how fast a week goes by when you are having a nice time but I have returned and am feeling very relaxed and am sporting a nice tan. Even my legs are tanned and they never see the light of day! Ok, if I'm honest half my legs are actually red rather than tanned due to unfortunate incident involving me not applying enough (any) suntan lotion. And when I say half I mean in a verticle line...

Miss C was predictably well received by my family which is of no great surprise as she is lovely. Of course I suspect she would have been just as well received if she had three legs and smelt of egg simply because I was taking an actual real life woman home for the first time ever. The more subtle family members made enquiries about how long we had been seeing each other and such like. The less subtle dove straight in asking if I'd only brought her home because she was pregnant. That rumour was hastily quashed!

Not all of our holiday was spent with my family tho. Half was spent in various places on the way down to Cornwall. And if - like us - you ever happen to be passing through Somerset and need a place to stay then go here - Batts Farm. We loved it. We kept hoping the owner would decide to adopt us so we could stay. Everything was just so fantastic - the quiet location, the amazing rooms but best of all was the attention to detail. Freshly baked bread and muffins in the morning (different selection every day), homemade biscuits in a tin in the bedroom, the option for breakfast in bed which we were tempted to try. We spent the rest of the holiday comparing things to there and they never measured up.

At the other end of the scale, don't go here. Pretty grotty to be honest. If you happened to be in around that area however, do go in to the pub part and sample the sticky toffee pudding. I suspect anyone sitting near us at the time thought we were having sex with the amount of moaning I was doing as I savoured every delicious, sticky mouthfull...

Hmmm, I think I should stop before that sentence sounds any more dodgy.